Engagement Time :)

Ohh Yesss... herez the time... ENGAGEMENT... a trailer of the Bigg Dayyy.. Am i ready for it?? Ok lemme think... dress...check.. makeup..check.. footwear..check... so what is left.. ME.. and am i ready mentally?? Ok lemme think over this.. this is the guy i wanted to be with for last 5 years of my life... do i love him? Yes of course.. but these butterflies in stomach.. I think it happens to all of us...

Yes I am a bit nervous.. the pressure to look great and to be in best of my behavior is high. i have to ensure i look good.. have to ensure that i am all smiley all the time..but not too smiley... aahh panic hits...


But I am also excited.. I get to meet him,,, live the moments i always only imagined... :) yes that leaves me all smiles :) :)

Living the Taboo of Inter-caste Marriage

Yess… I am getting married, getting married to the love of my life.. Yes it is an inter-caste marriage where ME, the girl belongs to a Punjabi Family, and HIM, the guy belongs to a Hindu Jaiswal Family.. Both families based in a small town where LOVE Marriage is a taboo and if topped by wedding between 2 individuals of different castes, it becomes a social stigma.. and we the lovebirds are reduced to victims of social norms.. Love is strong or atleast it makes you feel strong-headed enough, as it did in my case.. It took me a whole 1 year and 6 months to get my parents convinced to the fact that in a marriage 2 people loving each other is more important than the society agreeing to it.. Equally difficult for him was to convince his parents.. but it seems that some things are fate, destiny, written… coz finally both the set of parents agreed, and man not just did they agree, but they were happy.. really happy… and that is what brought us happiness…

 And now we have a date.. 25^th April 2012, to transform our love into a strong bond…  Here I am, 91 Days away from My D-Day… thinking of what will it be like to live the taboo.., How to I make people/ friends/ family overcome this stigma.. I can already see few hiccups… my extended in laws not getting tuned to the idea of Inter caste wedding… Their response on getting to know about the wedding – “Hamara Beta aisa nahi kar sakta, itne sanskaro se pala hai humne use” – Does it mean falling in love is apke sanskaron k khilaf?? Just because their ladla beta has chosen a bahu outside their religion / caste, so he becomes the villain of the extended family (Read Mausis / Mamas). And the added expectation from me-“ Dekhte hain dusri jaat ki bahu kaisi hogi” – Soo much performance pressure.. more than what I had in my MBA Exams.. It might sound ridiculous to even be bothered about the extended family, but honestly, I am not bothered about them, I am bothered about my In laws, coz in someways it’s my responsibility to be a Good Bahu , so as to make everybody swallow their words… I know what I have to do – To Please everyone, the question is HOW??  And this is only the beginning, don’t even ask me about whts going on my mind about adjusting in the small town, being a housewife (for sometime), having a new family.. ohh the kind of panic attacks I get these days… Let’s see how will things move… till then I am waiting.. Basking in the joy of atleast having a date on hand… Have quit my job and all I do these days is google, read, browse for images on decoration ideas, lehnga patterns. Mehndi designs.. and everything girly which I never did earlier… so yess I am enjoying this break from work…  and afterall I deserve it atleast now, coz 3 months from now, I may be busy making lavish dinner menu for my new family.. I know it is only tea-time now.. but then I will need time to think.. to do the prep and to patao My Sasu Ma with a Smile, to make her help me in the kitchen without offending her :)….

All the best to me :)

Shade 1 - The Small Town Girl :)

Yess… I am back….to write…to write about what I feel, what I go through.. Question – why on the blog? Answer – coz I don’t feel like maintaining a diary but still want to express myself… doesn’t really matter if anybody else reads the blog or not, what matters is whether I am able to express myself.. whether I let go the grudges I hold…

There is too much going around and Inside… Inside my head, my heart…

Gist – A small town girl, with big dreams in her eyes, ultra supportive parents… moves out of the town coz she doesn’t want to be the frog in the well… ohh she so hated the frog….. Falls in Love, is committed… and has to convince parents to get her married to this guy who loves her incredibly.. Makes a career for herself.. is where she wants to be professionally, makes money for herself.. pays her education loan.. is independent… and yet disciplined… and then the long cold war-ish period of 1.5 years to convince the parents about her love… and poofff.. one day they get convinced.. and want her to get married … but then the thought- the guy belongs to the same small town she hated.. wt to do now.. choose what- Love of her life + Small Town life or Her independence+ her life in Mumbai.. doesn’t know whether to use head or heart and then being the ultra emotional , ultra sensitive Piscean that she is, she follows her heart… The very, moment when these words are being typed, she is in this transition phase.. getting herself ready to let go her dreams, her career, her independence.. and embrace the new life, love.. and the small town life… Loves makes us to crazy things.. Things we never thought we will or we can do…

Love – another shade of life :) 

100 Shades of White....

Yess, My blog is named after a book that i have never read.. The question - Then why name the blog after a book I havn't read ? The Answer - Coz Life has taught me time and again , how it has different shades, how people have different sides and how life is not Black and White.. it is shades of White..shades of Black and in between shades of Grey.. That's how we are..

Starting a blog was something I have being procrastinating for soo long, and yet it is one thing that i have always wanted to do.. And now when I feel I have learnt enough, seen enough, felt enough, here I am, sharing with you, 100 Shades of White... Telling you how the real world appears to these ever dreamy eyes...:)